Dear Clothes Manufacturers…

Dear clothes manufacturers,

Hello, I’m a woman. I wear women’s clothes. I like skirts and trousers and pyjamas. I like to carry a handbag sure but I wear clothes. They keep me warm and they keep me covered, and they’re generally pretty comfortable.

I would like to talk to you today about a few things. Please bear with me.

  1. Pockets. 
    Yes. Those wonderful things that ALL men’s clothes have. Pockets. You know those handy things which come on clothes which can be used to STORE things? Those. They can be useful to all of the people. Why do men get pockets in EVERYTHING, yet women are subjected to pockets only on select things? What is that all about? Yes I may carry a handbag, but I want to put my phone or my change (or whatever else I carry and need quick access to) in a pocket, attached to my clothes. Please provide us with pockets. It would be lovely to have as many pockets as men do. Pockets in skirts, dresses, pyjamas, trousers – I just want more pockets please. I would like to commend you now on the fact that there is more clothing with real, usable pockets, alas there is much to be done in the pocket front. Keep up the good progress.
    Another thing… DEEPER POCKETS. Men get many deep pockets, some of the pockets on my clothes aren’t deep enough to house anything. Please consider that we want and need pockets which are as deep as the ones on men’s clothes. We have deep things to store, just like them!
    ONE MORE THING WHILE WE’RE ON POCKETS… Fake. Pockets. 
    WHO FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY DECIDED FAKE POCKETS WERE A GOOD IDEA? I MEAN, CMON. I HATE going shopping and finding a gorgeous dress, or a pair of trousers that would be perfect for work, or for just human’ing in and then finding that when I unzip the pocket it goes to NOTHING. A fake pocket. WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS? If you’re going to go to the effort of putting a fake pocket on, you could just use that effort on giving me a real pocket. One of the most frustrating things to play (yet funny) is POCKET OR NO POCKET. I play it often when shopping… the amount of times NO POCKET is the correct answer is frustrating. So either stop pretending there are pockets by making there be NOTHING there at all to even hint at a pocket, OR just give us a real pocket. That would be wonderful.
  2. Holes in clothing
    Why? Why? If my clothes get holes then I generally throw them out. Oh look, my t-shirt has a hole in, what a shame, I must now throw it out. My jeans have a hole in? Oh well, best throw them away and get a new pair. WHY WOULD I WANT TO BUY SOME WITH HOLES ALREADY IN? Now I recognise that lots of people do in fact like this trend and I could just be the untrendiest person in the world here, but I do not understand it. So please can we cut down the holes in clothes thing? That would be lovely.
  3. Jeans
    Now this one could take me a while to articulate. I hate buying jeans. I have asked some female friends this before and they too hate jeans shopping. Just today looking at my Facebook someone was complaining about buying jeans and a lot of replies came saying that they too hated buying jeans. Going shopping for jeans is one of those experiences that crushes my confidence. It never fails to baffle me. There does not seem to be a universal jean sizing rule. I can be one size in one shop and then a completely different size in another – HOW? What is that all about?
    ALSO even within shops I can be a different size – depending on dye. Black jeans and blue jeans I am a different size for. This baffles me. Please can we have some kind of universal sizing for jeans? This would make me, the rest of the jean hating buying people and probably the world.

That is all for now. Thank you for your time. It has been a pleasure.

Steph (on behalf of WomenForPockets, WomenWhoHateBuyingJeans and WhyDoesMyTopHaveHolesIn?) x

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7 thoughts on “Dear Clothes Manufacturers…

  1. Aoife says:

    YES. I would sell my left leg for a few pockets in my dresses. I even have a tracksuit pants that doesn’t have pockets in it and it really doesn’t work for going on a walk!

    Like

  2. harrietspringbett says:

    Ha ha! Thanks for making me laugh with your rant. I hate shopping for jeans too – but then I hate all shopping… And I recognise that plunging disappointment when you try out the pockets in a shop, only to fumble about with a stupid flap – and how silly you feel when you realise it’s not you being clumsy, just the clothes’ manufacturer playing jokes on innocent shoppers.

    Like

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